Velveeta, the Man Pleaser

Velveeta has been called many things through the years, but 'man pleaser' has to be low on its list of characteristics. This Better Homes and Gardens advertisement from October 1954 created a sensation with the introduction of five family recipes sure to please everyone: thrifty enough to satisfy the pocketbook, hearty enough for the hardworking husband, and wholesome enough for children and the calcium-depleted elderly! That makes Velveeta a winner, if you ask me!

When you serve this casserole of noodles, hard cooked eggs, and melted Velveeta, the only cries you'll hear at the dinner table will be cries for 'more!'


Who knew how gourmet Velveeta truly could be? Your table will feel a whole lot more cosmopolitan with Epicure's Chicken and Broccoli (it's like Chicken Divan... with Velveeta!) and the crowd-pleasing Party Special, a shrimp-Velveeta melt that will make your parties the hit of the social season!

Most importantly, just two ounces of Velveeta Pasteurized Process Cheese Spread has more calcium than a glass of milk!

Best of Better Homes - August '54

Today's post is a medley of articles from the August 1954 issue of Better Homes and Gardens.

First up is the latest in the regular 'Famous foods from famous places' feature covering the restaurant Daven Haven in the Pines, located in Grand Lake, Colorado. Look at these humdingers! First, there's the regional Denver Sandwich lunch complete with an Ice-cream-cone Clown. Also, hobo picnics! Each hobo sack was stuffed with two sandwiches (chicken and cheese spreads), fruit, a lollipop and a personalized cookie. Now that's a lunch I'd leave my home for!


Daven Haven was just as admired for its elaborate breakfasts and buffets. A typical Daven Haven breakfast might have included Rocky Ford cantaloupe, Blueberry Pancakes with Orange Whipped Butter, and Frizzled Ham. But, it was their buffets that were gold standard; the centerpiece of the table here is the Ham Loaf with Horse-radish Sauce (food stylists take note!) served in a hollowed-out zucchini and Individual Spoon Breads.


'Come On -- It's a porch picnic!' Well, who would argue with that? Especially when you catch a glimpse of the ruby red gelatin salad cradling a yellowy dressing (Barbecue Salad?). And the tartlets awaiting their anointment of cream (Peach-blush Tarts?). By the time you tear your eyes up to see the fried chicken, it's starting to resemble normal picnic food.


It's not quite August (soon, too soon), but Myrna Johnston reminds us that it's never too soon to prepare with this menu of frosty-fresh fare. Quick party pleasers include the 'gelatin beauty', the Summer Chicken Salad, cute garnishes, and Sugar-frosted Grapes. Or have a full-blown Fruit Bonanza with Pink Jewel Molds, a marriage of cream cheese balls and sparkling gelatin.


More tutti-frutti favorites and towers of vegetable delights. And when you're looking to eat out on the terrace, make sure you have your bologna and deviled egg cornucopias and at least one Tomato Aspic mold!

Summer Bummer

Summer, the bane of my existence, is back. Now, I realize that most normal people adore these sweaty summer months and insist on spending as much time as possible outdoors with the sun beating down on them. Apparently, this is not a new phenomenon. Better Homes and Gardens published a Summer Cook Book by Myrna Johnston in their July 1954 issue for just this sort of summer-loving person. From little vittles of the meat, cheese, and crudité variety to full-blown sandwiches and desserts, Myrna Johnston compiled a menu ideal for any summer get-together, be it a picnic, cook-out, or block party. (Remember, you can always click on these thumbnails for bigger pictures -- in every post!)

On those sweltering evenings when I hear neighbors enjoying their grilled cook-outs, I'll be imaging everyone is really noshing on these two menu items. The Summer Sandwich Loaf takes the perennial favorite one step further and gives it an unexpected seasonal twist (an olive-daisy trim). From the description: 'The pink filling's ham; the other, egg salad. "Frosting" is cream cheese. Men will applaud.' That explains the cheering people I hear at neighborhood get-togethers! This year, when you hear jubilant merrymakers and fireworks in the distance, you can rest assured that they just can't control their excitement for their Summer Sandwich Loaf. Better still is the bulls-eye-inspired Rye-pie Sandwich. This duo is really the only acceptable way to sneak ham, egg, and salmon salads into one menu.



For a spread as modern as your furniture: alternate deviled ham and tomato fillings in a crusty bread (Ham Line-up Loaf), skip the meaty burgers from the grill and heap baked beans in buns (Beanwiches), and set sail with egg salad and black olive boats (Black-eyed Susans). Serve as much as possible in foil cozies. This menu is incredibly versatile: it will go with either your Miles Davis or your Martin Denny album.



Small summer appetites can easily be sated with Ham 'n Eggs, Summer Style (that's rolled ham slices and deviled eggs to you!). As an expert, I have deemed this an impeccable presentation for the Deviled Eggs. Finally, create a platter of fanned-out finger foods, including cheese, cucumbers, beans wrapped in your favored canned smoked luncheon meat, and crunchy vegetable garnishes. These relishes are the epitome of pertness!



Even if you're far from any coast, you can conjure up a beachy scene with starfishesque platters of Ham Mousse, and don't forget to put out some Barbecued Franks with Macaroni-and-Cheese Salad and a plate of your brand smoked luncheon meat (Treet, Prem, etc.)! Looking to create the ultimate summer memory? Golden Liverwurst Balls! Unfortunately, I thought they were marshmallows with toasted coconut. How wrong I was!



Room for dessert? Certainly! You'll make room once you get a look at that Raspberry Sno-Cap Pie, a gelatin pie covered with symmetrical spume and banana slices that seem to evoke the water choreography of Esther Williams.



Even more desserts to whet your appetite! Get a look at the Rainbow Meringue Sundaes, meringues topped with whimsical pastel ices! They're like fairytale crowns or, at least, a carnival on your plate! The Moonlight Cake is far less romantic than its name suggests. '"Moons" are gumdrop candies.' What is the purpose of the comb (or is it a rake?) next to the cake?

Mid-Century Milk

When you think of glamor and modern, cutting-edge cuisine that doesn't skimp on decadence, what ingredients immediately spring to mind? Caviar? Truffles? Of course not! Better Homes & Gardens wants to lure you in with the 'smooth, tempting flavor only Evaporated Milk can give'! Better Homes' February 1955 pictorial paean to that fast, thrifty modern miracle (and pantry staple) provides your kitchen magician with eleven fancy luncheon and dinner suggestions.

The Evaporated Milk fashion spread. I usually take a Tums when I experience 'come-again' flavor, but apparently that is a good thing when caused by Evaporated Milk!


'Evaporated Milk: It's what the blue bloods are having for dinner tonight'. Article (and this blog post) paid for by the American Dairy Association.


The new architectural (and literary) marvel: Choose Your Own Adventure Curry - complete with an impenetrable rice fortress!


The Peach Cream Salad looks like one of the mysterious stations run by the Dharma Initiative on ABC's television hit, Lost. What could be the purpose of all those cryptic red and green portals along the outer perimeter? Is the top decoration the sun or another sinister symbol made of cling peaches?? Why does a Peach Cream Salad call for horseradish??? Does Jacob live here???? Only 'time' will tell, but probably only one of these questions will be answered by the end of the series.


Decisions, decisions! Can't choose between vanilla and chocolate pudding? Try Twice Good Pudding! Note: This recipe spread must have been published before the advent of salad bars, where you can have Twice Good Pudding every day of the week. See, we take for granted how good we have it now! Also, I challenge you to find a noodle in the Noodle Ring with Mushroom Sauce! I see more potential noodle matter in the Cherry Almond Fluff!


The Loaf In A Loaf is the highlight of this page. It's an edible matryoshka with the outer loaf holding as many as eight other nested loaves! Or, rather, it's like a turducken. You can also try the Treasure Island Rabbit. Diced pimiento marks the spot!

Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy, part 3

Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy concludes with a look at a few proposed alternative energy sources that we have yet to explore to their fullest and a quick primer of conservation methods. I think America was supposed to learn about the importance of resolving the energy crisis in these final pages. Now, we've wasted years not devoting ourselves to developing a new domestic energy system, and conservation hasn't been embraced (or, possibly, forced) as it once was.

Sure, this comic may seem like a relic now, but it was an admirable attempt to educate children and deliver a message of personal responsibility and of hope for the future. Sadly, I think this sort of booklet would fall on mostly deaf ears now. Maybe we can convince Disney to reprint Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy with Mickey charging up his cell phone and Goofy despairing over the high prices of gasoline as he's trying to fill up his SUV!

That fruitless, hopeless search.


Alternative sources of energy must be found. Here, Goofy and Mickey learn about nuclear fission and hydroelectric plants. Kids, please don't try to plug appliances into a waterfall!




Just imagine if we had five gallon limits on gasoline today! That would just be a drop in the tank of everyone's SUV.


Enny discusses renewable energy sources like solar power. The #1 user for solar power? Egg cooking!


Water power and nuclear fusion


Electromagnetic, geothermal, and volcanic energies


Welcome to Conservation Station. Take a gander at Goofy's wind-driven soup cooler.


What ways can you think of to save energy?


It was all a dream, but Enny's message leaves a strong impression on Mickey and Goofy. And Goofy discovers yet another source of power.....


.....MULE!

Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy, part 2

As promised, here is part two of Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy. Yesterday we left off just as the dozing Mickey and Goofy were greeted by Enny, the Spirit of Energies past. Enny has a lot to show the eager pair about the history of energy usage. Soon you'll learn all about Goofy's contributions to our lives over the last few hundred years! Remember, everything you read below is indisputable fact! Click to enlarge all pictures. (© 1976, Walt Disney Educational Media Co.)

Documented early use of solar and mastodon power.


Goofy lucks into discovering water and wind power, and he develops the first windmill. He also accidentally invents the first batch of Silly Putty.


Goofy demonstrates the prototype of the Rube Goldberg back scratcher. The shortcomings of water and wind power are resolved by the discovery of steam power.


Goofy ushers in the era of coal and discovers electricity after almost being struck in a thunderstorm. All contrary to what text books will have you believe!


Is Goofy an idiot savant or just an idiot? Discuss. Also, remember learning about 'Goofy-power' in school?


The convenience and ease of electricity has directly resulted in our lazy and wasteful society. As more energy guzzling gadgetry are hoisted upon us, trash cans overflow with obsolete technologies, noise pollution saturates the once peaceful air, queues for the moving pictures clutter city streets, and many houses have too many butter churns! ..Then Goofy discovers Texas Tea.


Goofy and our dependence on Texas Tea ('Black Gold').


Welcome to the Petroleum Century.


We're all to blame!


The never-ending cycle of guilt.

Tomorrow's final installment of Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy delves into possible alternative energy sources and the lost art of conservation.

Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy, part 1

America's biggest mistake to date was not heeding Mickey Mouse and Goofy's dire warning. We first experienced a devastating energy crisis over thirty years ago. Despite clever attempts at energy conservation and political promises to gradually lessen dependence on foreign oil and other finite energy sources, we are in the midst of yet another energy crisis. It's almost as if no lessons were learned from the last energy crisis!

But, to Mickey Mouse and his best pal, Goofy, this all seems like deja vu. Right now, they are probably in their castle in California (or possibly Florida), reminiscing about the 1970s, their shared hallucination about a preachy anthropomorphic atom named Enny, and how all their displays of Yankee ingenuity were wasted on the American public. Did any president after, say, Jimmy Carter even consult this comic? Or, perhaps, T. Boone Pickens was the only person to have taken this tract seriously.

*cue Disco Donald Duck*

Come with me back to 1976, as we look with shame at some of the ways (mule power!) our current energy crisis could have been prevented. I present to you in three parts: Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy (© 1976, Walt Disney Educational Media Co.).

Note Enny's approval of Mickey and Goofy's creative conservation. Shouldn't we all be driving mules by now?


This comic's thesis is already prominent on the first page. The energy crunch is bad, and it contributes to the unpleasantness of average mice and goofs. Energy crises may contribute to the impoliteness of some citizens as they become less punctual, are more apt to make ludicrous excuses for their behavior, and assuage their guilty consciences with nosy questions and hurtful accusations. Others might seem 'not themselves': weak, wan, and lacking vim and/or vigor. That's the energy crunch, folks!


Mickey explains the energy crunch with a (guilt) trip to the U.S. Energy Bank where Goofy gets a lesson in fy-nite energy.


Mickey sets us straight: We can't wish energy crunches away.


Oblivious as usual, Goofy goofs (as evidenced by the panel where the sky turns an alarming shade of magenta) and his car runs out of gas. Goofy and Mickey trek to Otto's gas station which is deserted and boarded up. Otto's mom and pop business hasn't actually 'moved.' It was bought out by Mobil Oil. (In the fifth panel, doesn't it look like someone in the distance is yelling about the fuel gauge?)


This comic probably terrified many kids with its 'we're all going to die (and it's all your fault for ever being born)' scare tactics. But sometimes it takes a good scare to jolt us out of complacency.


Trekking through the desert heat makes Mickey and Goofy grow weary, and they stop to rest under a tree. They become unnaturally sleepy (a la Dorothy in the poppy field in The Wizard of Oz), and their sleep sounds are oddly Batmanesque (zawp, bzazz, zoop!?). Enny instantly materializes out of thin air to take them on the trip of many lifetimes. Meet Enny, the Spirit of Energies past.

Stay tuned tomorrow for part two of Mickey Mouse and Goofy Explore Energy when Enny will take us on a trip through the history of energy. It'll be better than a day at the Epcot Center!

Jell-O Love Wheel

Valentine's Day is the most romantic day of the year. All those cherubs and roses! Have you decided what delectable delights you will eat by candlelight tonight? As always, Curly Wurly has some entirely serviceable ideas that will undeniably set a distinctive mood. Heart-shaped boxes of chocolates and lobster tails have been done. Why not take a spin on these Jell-O brand menu wheels? Who knew that choosing which Jell-O salad goes with which meat is even more difficult than selecting the wine!

Feeling like Chicken tonight? This little coterie looks dazzling next to the Peaches a l'Orange! If you prefer your chicken fried, you might be interested in the Orange Glow Salad. That special crunch of pineapples and carrots is the perfect complement to the crispy coating!


Making Pork Chops tonight? Once again, if you're opting for fried, you want a crunchy salad accompaniment. Apple Crunch Salad is your best bet; it packs a triple crunch with its trio of apple, celery, and nuts! Apparently, breaded pork chops require something unusual and smooth. How about Saucy Yogurt Salad? I don't think I've ever seen an aspic salad quite like this one, though I have to say that there's nothing too objectionable in it.


There's no group of food that is more romantic than seafood; oysters, lobster, and shrimp have long been linked to love. I'm confident that fish slabs and this Pimiento Circle, that seems to shine as if lit from within, is the most romantic menu option for Valentine's Day. For something a little zestier, you can try the Pickle Salad (aka Cucumber Dill Slice).


It's never too early in the holiday season to make the ham. Give it a nice tropical glaze and pair it with the Pineapple Lime Temptation. Better yet, serve up the Banana Greens salad. It's so great that Jell-O insists it's 'great with any ham dish'!


Or, there is always the Carrot Cheese Ring, which is also great with any ham dish.


As many cookbooks have revealed, the best way to a man's heart is through his stomach. If that is so, hamburger is surely a one-way ticket. Leave off the buns, omit the fries, and feed him the Ranch Relish Salad or the Tangy Tomato Mold. Just wait until he tells the whole neighborhood what a great cook you are!


Another hamburger salad option is the Red Red Salad. Strawberry flavored gelatin, catsup, and green pepper! Best to serve with some Red Red Wine.


The Longhorn Salad is practically an extension of the steak dinner. Or, better yet, make him feel like a king with the Asparagus Castle! For future reference, food should probably not be named after an edifice that is meant to withstand attack from hostile invaders.


Bell Pepper Salad also goes well with steak dinners!


So does the French Bean Basket! Plus, 'basket' sounds less imposing than 'castle.'

For more Jell-O (and don't we all want more Jell-O?), wiggle on over to Months of Edible Celebrations to take a look at Louise's assortment of Jell-O booklets! Now, some of the desserts in her booklets might actually pass for romance!

Squiggles and Scribbles

Sparkleneely, author of one of my favorite blogs, 97 Things To Do Before You Turn 97, gave me an award for achievement in the field of Blog Scribbling! I am thrilled and honored to be recognized by one of my favorite bloggers! I'd like to thank my agent, my personal trainer, and you at home!

According to the rules of the award:

'Each Superior Scribbler must in turn pass the Award on to 5 most-deserving Blog Friends. You must link to the author and name of the blog from where he/she has received the award.

You must display the Award on your blog and link to THIS POST, which explains the Award. Each blogger who wins The Superior Scribbler Award must visit THIS POST and add your name to the Mr. Linky List. That way, they will be able to keep up-to-date on everyone who receives this prestigious honor. You must post these rules on your blog.'

According to the fine print, not doing all of the above is a serious offense punishable to the full extent of the law, much like removing the tag from a mattress, so I have no choice but to obey! Unfortunately, my first inclination would be to award this to one of my favorite blogs, 97 Things To Do Before I Turn 97, but I don't think that's possible since she already received it! It was a well-deserved win, and if you've been searching for one of the most engaging and endearing, and one of the funniest and most poignantly relatable, blogs on the internet, I'm excited to point you in her direction! Get caught up on Sparkleneely's list of accomplishments before she's checked everything off her list!

Now I'm faced with the most difficult part: I must name five worthy blogs. All of the blogs on my blogroll (and the ones that I follow and read daily) are worthy of receiving this, or any, award; however, I have been directed to name only five favorites. Here they are, in no particular order:

1) Food With Eyes - I don't know what it is, but I almost feel like I know Lushie Peach, author of Food With Eyes, in real life. Besides posting the best graphics on the internet hands-down, she seems to have an uncanny talent for finding images of foods with eyes wherever she goes!

2) Expo Lounge - Jason has an unbelievably fabulous collection of Expo 67 collectibles and other vintage ephemera. His blog has to be one of the must-see stops for anyone interested in reliving the Montreal World's Fair, and his collection is an inspiration!

3) Kitchen Retro - Kitchen Retro is one of my newer favorites. Lidian's blog is one of my daily doses of humor. Of course, once again, she has managed to find some of the most intriguing and inane vintage advertisements and images, and her commentary is beyond superb!

4) Months of Edible Celebrations - Louise's blog is better than Wikipedia! I am always awed at the depth and the deliciousness of her culinary explorations. It's amazingly topical and informative, and, once again, she finds some great pictures!

5) A Sampler of Things - Years ago, I got a fantastic book of vintage packaging called Krazy Kids' Food. It became an instant favorite. I was thrilled to discover its author, Dan Goodsell, shares even more packaging images on his blog and on Flickr. It's like a Krazy Kids' sequel every day!

Once again, thank you Karen for the award! Have fun exploring the blogs of all the new award winners!

Resolution #5: Have Fun With Alcohol And Astrology

Curly Wurly's final New Year's Resolution post promises not only to instruct you in the art of having fun but also how to learn more about yourself. So, if the Coke in the previous post hasn't helped to 'add life' as promised, it may be time to take a gander at Mixology featuring '44 famous mixed drinks' and, most importantly, a primer of Happy Hour astrology! This booklet was published in 1971 by the Southern Comfort Company who offer this disclaimer to all moon-children of legal drinking age: 'Intent of astrology data herein is simply to inform, not to advise. Therefore any personal application is the individual's responsibility.' I guess Southern Comfort can't be held directly responsible for the humiliation an Aquarius might experience when he or she discovers that electric blue, their birth color, is an unappealing shade for their attire. (Remember to click on the pictures for full-size pages with astrological and drink information)

Mixology is about more than having you drink bottles of Southern Comfort every week. It's also about having fun and finding yourself spiritually. While this booklet is mostly an advertisement for Southern Comfort and a guide to the many beverages you can make using Southern Comfort, it is, more importantly, an invaluable 1970s fashion spread. It's impossible to pull your eyes away from the clothing and hair styles and the mesmerizing artificial smiles. I don't think I've ever been so aware of how many teeth people have; you can practically count them here!


Southern Comfort will school you in making your Happy Hour party out of this world! What's Southern Comfort, you ask? Well, it's not like ordinary whiskey: 'It actually tastes good, right out of the bottle!' Basically, it's special, it's delicious, it's remarkable. And, if you want your party to be special and remarkable, it must be the only whiskey you buy. Once you're serving the whiskey that all the pros endorse, your party needs only a few astrological charts to make it truly out of this world!


No, it's not enough to know your sign! What's your ruling planet? What's your element? You can know everything about that person you have your eye on just by finding out their birthday!


Wide lapels? Janet and Chrissy? This must be a 70s cocktail party! Remember, this suave Tom Selleck-like dreamboat will only come to those parties that serve Southern Comfort. Don't expect his RSVP if you plan on serving one of those other brands!


Resolutions are all about improvement. Take, for instance, the drink recipes in Mixology. You could have ordinary cocktails or you could have improved cocktails. All it takes is some Southern Comfort in place of your regular, bad-tasting whiskey, and you're all set!


Today's your lucky day! This crowd posing with their Comfort Old-Fashioneds is smugly considering how all the ritzy celebrities and fashionistas in Beverly Hills and Paris are sipping on the very same drink.


Glen Campbell and Erik Estrada popped in to learn a bit about palmistry (and they heard you were serving a Whiskey Comfort Sour)!